52 Comments
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Sudana Krasniqi's avatar

“The Partisan’s (under construction) complaint department”, omfg I’m working on it okay!

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Phisto Sobanii's avatar

FASTER YOU FOOL

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Kevin Maher's avatar

😂

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scott m's avatar

You've been doing "this shit" since you were 13? Two years already?

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Phisto Sobanii's avatar

Time flies.

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Vanechka's avatar

good to be in the same paragraph with Snowden 🤝

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Matthew Haviland's avatar

"i am known for mercy in some special cases like funny puns or nice tits/face)"

Samuel L Jackson: "Shit, [ ], that's all you had to say!"

But seriously, I was wondering how this would turn out, and it's classic. Can't believe you wrote an actual guide. I love this writing style, by the way. Sort of like e. e. cummings wrote a post. Perfect.

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Angela Morris's avatar

clever shit and you found good use for the strikethrough feature, which only a shitposter could do

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MRT’s Haircut's avatar

Shitposter 101. Let’s order some pizza Mr Hand!

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Laggy's avatar

“Those guys are phags!”

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Teresa Parmenter's avatar

Excellent! Being from Indiana originally, I too since 6th grade have been trying to make people laugh! One stint I did the entire 6th grade class was relinquished from watching a film! Just the beginning of my many pranks. Life is too short - laugh and enjoy everything possible thank you Doc. Love u - now lock your office door and go back to sleep

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J.S. Kasimir's avatar

I believe in Phisto Supremacy

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Joyce's avatar

Crying here with laughter 🤣🤣🤣

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Teresa Parmenter's avatar

Same!

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Jacqueline Rendell's avatar

All good advice. Currently absorbing and metabolizing your proffered nutrition.

I'm curious~ what were you up to BEFORE you turned 13?

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Phisto Sobanii's avatar

Nothing all that special.

I remember the moment I decided to be more outgoing in public. That was the first step of my journey to... fuckery.

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Lia's avatar

I'm guessing you read Hunter S. Thompson at an impressionable age.

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Jacqueline Rendell's avatar

into.........your destiny....

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Phisto Sobanii's avatar

shitpost my way to a drone strike!

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Jeff McConnell's avatar

Twelve?

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Duke Of Earl's avatar

See the problem with poasts like this is the lack of sauces. That, and no wisdom of the young (from the mouth of babes and all that).

As my youngest daughter Sultana said the other day (I'm raisin some good kids), talking to her older sister Cherry about their brother Prunejuice, "It's all so runny!"

Never a truer word... Our little Prunes can do 100m in under a lamppost, which is impressive by any standards if you ask me, which you should because I know about such things.

Oh and don't be misled by the typos! They're aunt Annie.

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Old Jarhead's avatar

Ha! Another cheap shot boomer joke. First one I’ve heard in at least three minutes. It’s good to be underestimated.

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Greg Dimiczky's avatar

What's the opposite of shitposting? Is there a term/slur for aggressively unfunny finger-waving shit like Cold Pocket? You should check out Cum Town.

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Miep's avatar

Another strategy, though a challenging one, is agree with people who attack you personally. Laugh at them is good, ignore them is good. There's some art to agreeing.

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Laggy's avatar

Yo Shitpostocles. This is really hitting for me. Helped me to re-center, and focus on what matters most.

Fair warning: I’m going to end up posting some stupid shit in the coming weeks. It will most likely come in the form of a triggered, unreasonable rant.

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Laggy's avatar

Phisto Sobanii is an educated man…now I really hate him.

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