On Being The Right Man In The Wrong Place
If I must be a hypocrite, I might as well be an employed one.
Compromise isn’t a dirty word, I’ve heard it said. I certainly hope so, considering the ones I’ve had to make with myself. If you refuse to bury them, they’re probably the toughest decisions any of us have to reconcile.
Welcome to another occasional musing from The Partisan, an anarchist living in 21st century America. Sit back, grab a drink, and enjoy. Or not! It’s your life, who am I to tell you what to do?
Introductions done, let’s cut to the quick. What compromise am I talking about here? What’s my hypocrisy?
I’m an anarchist voluntarily working in corporate America. More specifically, I’m part of a start up tech company looking to make its mark in the way Google, Amazon, and many others have. While drawing that paycheck in such a problematic sphere I have a deep belief the State, in whatever form it takes, is the single greatest detriment to human flourishing in history and should be totally dismantled forthwith at virtually any cost.
Now, dear reader, kindly put down that vodka bottle and let’s get that gasoline back in the car. I’ll certainly explain myself, and more importantly, elucidate on the long game.
I found myself in this position more by chance than anything else. After a devastating diagnosis and period of illness, I was well enough to work again. My skills and experience just happened to match what my company needed at the time, and after a brief interview, I joined up.
Why did I do so? Well, less than a year prior to that moment I was lying in a hospital bed, dying. The people I work for now are intelligent, kind, and willingly took a chance on me very early in the process of creating their dream. They had already sacrificed much themselves, it should be noted.
When they offered me the job I thought, “Fuck it.” I had nothing to lose. Still don’t.
What then? Well, over the months and years our little band of internet ruffians grew. If you’re at all familiar with starting a new business, specifically in tech, our story isn’t all that strange. We had success, failure, and all the usual growing pains a little venture like ours does.
Fast forward to yesterday. I’m leading a new office with a big problem on its hands. I’ve got a pretty good idea how to handle it, but my instincts scream at me to gather my team and talk it over with them. Even though my people are relative neophytes to business and our work specifically, consensus is still pretty sexy. We get together, I lay out the issue and my own thoughts on the matter, and I ask them what they think.
My plan was terrible, turns out. I ask them why and they spell it out forcefully with excellent reasoning and insight. We put our heads together, create a consensus, and move forward with what I can only describe as gloriously glad hearts.
I’ve said before in this space that no one consents to my rule and I consent to no one else’s. Of course, my team and I are all getting paid here and one could make the argument our rulers, so to speak, compel us with force to come to agreement. You’ve got to believe me though when I say that’s not what happened here. Why? Well, I do this strange thing where I just ignore the fact I get paid to do this. Compensation factors into nothing I do or say, ever. I then go forward trying to show others how that works.
Benefits of an autotelic personality, I reckon? Perhaps it’s supported by my fiercely egalitarian and data driven bosses? Probably a little bit of both and more.
In any case, I’ve done my best to approach my life and work putting aside the inconsistencies and remembering perfect is the enemy of good. I’d rather take a chance, value praxis over theory, and see where it gets us. Better to try and fail than stay in an ivory tower, never having done anything.
I suspect that makes hypocrisy the price of action. You make your choices, you take your chances, and you and yours hope for the best.
After that meeting, I have to say the feeling of solidarity amongst my team makes me believe I’m right in my approach. And I hope, with what wisdom my years have, I’m showing them how to move forward in a way that has been satisfying not just to me but generations of anarchists; a way that sustains us whatever horrors the State and world might concoct.
I consent to no one’s rule. No one consents to mine. We can make a way forward, together, if we just trust each other and get to know one another. Share our struggles. Share our hope. Share our resources. And in faith, believe our bowls will overflow because of it.
So what’s the long game? Spoiler: there isn’t one. I’m just doing me, what I believe is right in every moment, and hoping it works out somehow. Have to say, it’s a more satisfying approach than stepping into a voting booth to sign over my autonomy to one moron or another. It’s absolutely better than bending my knee in fealty to some psychopath with a god complex.
I hope it works out. If it doesn’t, so be it.
Give it a go yourself, reader. In the final toiling, you might actually like it.
I enjoy your writing, Phisto, and I'm glad you are alive. You don't seem to be an anarchist, though. Words like "libertarian", "disrupter" and the term "free thinker" come to mind.
Here is what anarchists do:
The Wall Street bombing of 1920 — 100 years later
https://nypost.com/2020/09/16/the-wall-street-bombing-of-1920-100-years-later
This is what disrupters do:
Trump's Biggest Accomplishments, Failures From His 1 …
https://www.businessinsider.com/trump-biggest...
This is what free thinkers do:
On Tour | The Official Bob Dylan Site
https://www.bobdylan.com/on-tour
Best wishes always & Happy Thanksgiving,
C2